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Life after Infidelity

If an affair just revealed itself, chances are you feel what can modestly be described as unbearable hurting. Once you realize however, that it is not yourself to blame for your spouse’s infidelity, you can instantly see the potential emeerging out of this seemingly disaster.

Singledom is Okay

Most people do this mistake, hurrying into a new relationship without first healing completely. This, although an understandable reaction,  is unfortunately ineffective.  With no proper curative time, any follow-up relationships are bound to fail.

No matter how many years you’ve been in a relationship, or marriage, being single is neither bad, nor shameful.  A slight change of perspective, will allow you to see the potential behind being single.

Being single for a change, you will be able to do and be things you couldn’t because of your relationship, like go live in another country or even continent, change profession and so on. Paradoxical as this might sound, infidelity can open up doors and provide you with new opportunities. Make the effort and grab them, now is the time to realize any dreams and hopes your relationship has been compromising or incapacitating. Now that you are single, there are no excuses. Just go for it.

Evolve, Change, Progress

This is then your time. The time to be the real you, only better. To be and do things for yourself, without accountability and guilt.  Ironic as this might sound, a cheating incident, gives you a wisdom and good judgement you did not previously possess.

Reconsidering your past actions, behaviour and perspective on life, will allow you to see clearer your mistakes and weaknesses. But most importantly, you’ll be able to pinpoint your strengths and find ways to elaborate them for your wellbeing.

Trusting Again

Life after infidelity

The time will come, that a new flirt will enter your life unhurriedly.  Without obsessing on who’s going to be your new partner,  and over-analyzing your insecurities, a new relationship at the right time, will be everything your previous one lacked.

 

Several books on infidelity and how to cope with the pain have been published, we recommend:

Infidelity: A Survival Guide

After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful

Getting Past the Affair: A Program to Help You Cope, Heal, and Move On — Together or Apart

Categories: Relationships
Mamta Verma: passionate writer